Rotten Egg Reggie

Early on, Reggie McPoochie’s parents knew their child was different. Instead of the traditional baby diet of milk and pureed vegetables, Reggie insisted upon eating eggs…old eggs. He also stunk worse than any other baby in history, his odor resembling a cross between ripe farts, sulphur and sweaty jock straps. One time his mom even passed out while changing his poopy diapers; thereafter, both parents wore oxygen masks around the house.

Reggie was even more trouble as a teen, stealing eggs from the local market, burying them under a portable toilet, and waiting for them to ripen before he’d chuck them at unsuspecting cars and neighbors, leaving them coated in a sticky, stenchy mess. His ability to nail a moving target has made him a first draft pick for next years Blaster Bowl, where he hopes to compete against his old nose wrinkling nemesis, The Master Blaster.