The Master Blaster

The Master Blaster was born on Brown Loaf Lane and infamy began at the tender age of 1, when his diapers were labeled hazardous materials by the local authorities. His rancid rep was sealed on his third birthday, when he almost set the house on fire by “blowing” out the candles with a bodacious butt blast.

Blaster never brushes, showers or picks the lint from out of his belly button. He's also got a nasty snaggle tooth with 18 cavities! For fun, Blaster enjoys building Lincoln logs out of dried cat turds.